Maybe I could go back to my old school class notes for a quick review on how to manage this situation. Or maybe there was a book to read that would help me out! I can laugh about it now but it was anything but funny back then! To say the least, it was extremely stressful.  

As a parent, we have the ultimate honor and responsibility to teach and train our children.  

Every day, we are faced with making many tough decisions on school, sports, social life, etc. This decision on whether Bethanie continues the student pathway or embarks the pro pathway definitely ranks as one of the tougher ones. 

Having faithfully stayed the course with Bethanie's junior and pro-development and coordinating the development of many other players and their families over the decades, I have developed a clear working knowledge of multiple development tracks. Whether they are the highest pro-development track or the highest levels of student/athlete academic tracks.  Deciding on a college or university is really stressful. This is a time that produces a lot of anxiety and worries, not only for parents, but also for the kids who are having to make their first big decision that affects the direction their lives will go. 

At the end of the day, I believe the choice of college is ultimately the kids' decision, and one they will have to be held accountable to, and responsible for. If we were to manipulate them to make "our" decision, that would come back to kick us later. If they feel we had a say in their decision, they always have an out and someone to blame if things don't work out for them and that's a whole different pressure. Of course, we should offer help and advice on college selection and lay out the facts. However, the decision has to be theirs. 

Personally, I have experienced the entire college recruiting process as a youngster playing sports in high school and wooed by over 200 colleges and universities.  I've personally had to deliberate athletic and academic scholarship offers with myself (back in the day) and each of my children. I've had to consider (and antagonize) on NLI (National Letters of Intent) signing day to verbal commitments and the signing of sponsorship deals as I have personally procured and managed multiple sponsorship deals, for Bethanie, as a minor and an adult.  

It's my hope that you can draw some valuable golden nuggets from my experiences.  

Historically, the college track to the pros has been very risky. It's been a very rare feat for any college player to receive their four-year degrees and graduate into the pros and even more rare for a player to have a successful professional career. But this is starting to change, as I mentioned above. 

 It is important to note that an athlete who goes to a high-level sports and academic school such as the ones I just mentioned can have the best of both worlds. They can become professional athletes or if they choose to continue the academic path rather than the athletic path it is an easy transition from schools like Notre Dame, Duke or Vanderbilt to a Masters Degree course at, say, Harvard, Yale or Princeton. 

A hard truth of going to an Ivy League School as an undergraduate is that it virtually rules out any future professional sports career. I have yet to know of any woman doing this whereas only one guy (James Blake) made this transition. The in-house coaching and conference competition just simply isn't strong enough, yet the student-athletes are still required to make the time commitment each day to train for 3 hours, in a substandard coaching/training environment, with players whose main goals are to compete academically, graduate with honors, and land their first job. With practice and academics very demanding, any time for outside training/coaching would simply be very limited. 

Let's talk about the relevance of verbal commitments. There is a big difference whether an athlete signs a National Letter of Intent (NLI) or gives a verbal commitment. You will note that a verbal commitment can be changed or withdrawn at any time. Making this verbal commitment can remove anxiety from a student-athlete. It's common to see better tournament results once that anxiety is removed.

"National Letters of Intent may only be signed by prospective student-athletes who will be entering a four-year institution for the first time in the academic year after they sign the NLI. Recruits who have signed NLIs must attend the schools they have signed with in order to receive financial aid, and NCAA rules forbid coaches from recruiting them further; these restrictions aim to add certainty to the recruiting process for players (who are certain to receive aid) and coaches (who are certain that a recruit will attend their school). By contrast, verbal commitments are non-binding. Recruits may change or revoke a verbal commitment at any time and coaches may continue to recruit a verbally committed player.

The restrictive nature of the NLI is designed to be advantageous to both prospective student-athletes and intercollegiate athletics programs. Intercollegiate athletics departments are not required to provide financial aid in cases where a student-athlete is not admitted for academic reasons. Seth Davis, a columnist for Sports Illustrated, has suggested that this arrangement is actually disadvantageous to student-athletes, as they have no recourse if an athletics department decides not to admit a player for non-academic reasons.  For example, an athletics department could replace a signed recruit with another recruit by claiming that the first one was not admitted for academic reasons."

It is my goal as a parent and a development coordinator to share my many experiences in raising and developing Bethanie and my other three children. The experiences Heidi and I had raising all four of our champions were at the extremes of both sides of the spectrum. The four were very different and were training to the highest levels of athleticism and athletic accomplishment. This training was a driving force that allowed them to go after and achieve the highest levels of academia, music (piano), psychology, military officer training, business entrepreneurship, digital product development, and social media marketing. I don’t pretend to know all of the answers, but I do have a pretty solid handle on what it takes to Raise The Champion that each of my four kids were meant to be.

Until next time, Tim